I hear it all the time,
“You wait until she starts taking his toys..”
“he wont always want to cuddle her”
“You think its cute now, give them a few years”
I could not believe the number of loaded statements I have heard about sibling rivalry since the arrival of little#2.
Im fully aware that my two babes will not always be the bestest of friends, but I do want to hopefully help them create a lasting bond and help strengthen their relationship early on. So I did some research on ways to help foster sibling relationship.
Here are some tips I came across:
Childhood Brother and Sister Relationships
Step 1 Treat your kids fairly.
Children notice from a very young age how they are treated by their parents as compared to their siblings, according to sociologist Christine Carter in a January 2010 article on the Greater Good Science Center’s website. She recommends that you shouldn’t focus on treating children exactly the same but instead focus on treating them fairly, in terms of the amount of affection and attention shown. You should also avoid double standards as the children grow into teens, such as allowing your boys to date at a certain age but not your girls.
Step 2 Set regular family bonding time.
As kids get involved in different activities, they may wind up rarely seeing each other during the week, which could cause them to drift apart. Prevent this by setting aside time each week for family bonding, such as family game nights or mandatory family dinners at least a few nights a week.
Step 3 Plan special activities that all the siblings enjoy together. Take the kids to gender-neutral places that you know both your boys and girls will enjoy together. For example, taking the kids to a natural history museum to see dinosaur bones might only be interesting to one of your kids, but going to a family-friendly water park is something you know they all will enjoy. Sharing fond memories can make your kids more willing to work out conflicts with each other, according to Kyla Boyse, R.N., in a University of Michigan report on sibling rivalry.
Step 4 Teach your kids tools needed to work out their own conflicts. This includes teaching them how to respond calmly to emotionally charged situations, according to Carter. She recommends playing a coaching role when conflicts arise between siblings. But too much involvement can be misconstrued as you taking sides. Working it out on their own can bring brothers and sisters closer, especially if they can avoid getting into trouble with you for fighting.
What tips can you give me that have worked with your little ones and their sisters and brothers?